Photo: stolen from another blog. Includes erroneous egg.

I’m going to take you on a journey. But first; a very important question: do you like salt?

Good. Read on.

This journey began with my discovery that I don’t actually hate Marmite, which was just before I wrote a fairly bog-standard blog piece about my discovery that I don’t actually hate Marmite.

After this there are no more narrative bullet-points of particular note in the journey, until today.

Today I constructed and ate a bacon and Marmite sandwich with salted butter. The bread was a co-op brown French stick, for those interested, though if anything, this let the other components down a bit. There were no vegetable elements involved, unless you count various vegetable extracts in the Marmite.

Although this may well be construed as Average Food Blog’s first recipe, I do not think it requires me to spell out the full method of its creation. I do not make judgements or pile expectations upon you, the chef – but I do make judgements upon arteries.

Arteries are moaners. You should never listen to moaners. And most of all, you should not let death creep up on you; you should stare it in its face and see who blinks. This is something that I have already said before, albeit marginally less verbosely, in my piece about salt as a stand-alone food concept.

Anyway, the sandwich was absolutely delicious. Layer upon layer of saltiness, a tang of yeast – a succulent challenge to fate; an affirmation of the life-enhancing pleasures that can be found in the lower reaches of the barrel marked ‘food consumption.’




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