CEREAL KILLER CAFE

Hitler and Pol Pot

Hitler and Pol Pot

First of all, let’s get one thing out the way. We at AFB are as left-leaning as the next pair of semi-employed artistic freelancers, but this is not the place for earnest political debate about Marxist dialectics. We are not the Morning Star. There will be no analysis of the pernicious effects of gentrification; no suggestions as to the overthrow of the capitalist patriarachy; no warm baths with Jeremy Corbyn. If you want that sort of thing, what the flip are you doing reading a food blog anyway?

Given this level of aggressive apoliticism, AFB felt it could walk into the Cereal Killer Cafe with relative impunity. We wanted to see what all the fuss was about, and whether the aforementioned establishment was a justifiable target for the angry mob in pig masks that ransacked the place in the name of anti-gentrification last week. And, well, the conclusion we came to was this: in a world of shootings, rape and subjugation; in a world of tax-avoidance and bankers’ bonuses; in a world of food banks and starvation, a small independent business with beds with Sonic the Hedgehog covers isn’t exactly the apotheosis of evil. I’m not saying it’s great, but come on people. It’s a cafe selling cereal. It’s not Dachau.

And what of the food? AFB paid £3.50 for a bowl of Nesquick with skimmed milk. Read into that what you will.

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