Having covered off Curry Club and Chicken Club in a fastidiously lazy manner, it seems only right that I move trudgingly on to Wetherspoon’s Friday night offering, which is controversially not deemed a Club, but ‘Fish Friday’.

Alright then, Fish Friday, you contrary fishy weekend revolutionary, what have you got?

Well, first of all, a limited selection of items riffing on the basic concept ‘fish and chips’, and second of all, the kind of lovingly-crafted utter mediocrity you can expect from every Wetherspoon meal other than either ham, egg and chips or gammon, egg and chips.

It was clear to see that the fish was patchy in coloration once the batter began rolling off like Wilko wallpaper, which in itself could be seen as problematic if trying to look for positives about the meal. Any forensic would surmise that blows had been made against the flesh of this beast – battered to death. Geddit? Yeah? Yeah? Good.

The chips were good, bordering on excellent. They always are; Wetherspoon employs star chip chefs in any given locality. The peas were convincingly chip shop-esque, in the sense that a Tony Blair rubber mask is convincingly Tony Blair-esque.

In short, replace the fish with ham or gammon and you’re on to a winner.

An additional observation is that perversely, during Fish Friday in the Wetherspoon outlet I happened to be in (Coronet, Holloway Road, London) there was also an offer available on strawberry daiquiris. Nobody whatsoever was drinking them, with or without a fish-based meal.

FISH: 3/10

CHIPS: 8/10


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