What were they thinking calling it a ‘lion’? Lions are scary and unpredictable, whereas the Lion Bar I purchased yesterday afternoon was solidly dependable, and not in the least bit scary. In fact, I’d go so far as to say the bar in question was nothing whatsoever like a lion. For one thing, it was nestled in a compartment containing several other exactly similar bars. Perhaps if each Lion Bar was placed in amongst a group of different chocolate bars, preferably wimpy ones like Aeros, the name would be more apt. They probably should have called the bar ‘Cow’ or something. Cows are sturdy and reliable, and live in herds and that. And the name would be even more accurate given that chocolate, the main ingredient of said bar, is in fact mostly comprised of milk, which comes from a cow.  Suffice it to say that unnecessary angst was caused by all this, thus detracting from the overall eating experience.

Far more leonine, in fact, was the rather severe man behind the counter who facilitated the purchase of the aforementioned Bar. He even had hair that stuck out at the sides, a bit like a lion’s mane, thus elevating the overall experience into the realms of the adequate.

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